Wasted. Broken. Crazy. Words that best describe me the night I turned into nothing. The identity I held for the past three years was shattered. The last thing I can remember is that I just cursed everything involved to my problem. Thinking if I still have a purpose to do in this world.
I was born in a Christian family. But during my boyhood to pre-adolescent years, I don't have a taste in attending weekly services. I restricted my walk with God by personally studying the Bible and having weekly Bible study with my family.
The routine continued for the next years until I became a high school student. Slowly, my interest on studying the Bible was buried by tons of requirements in a secular school.
I have my religion, but the relationship was thrown.
That relationship was replaced when I had romantic connections with a girl in our school. For 3 years since 2007, I thought that I will make that relationship last, different from the high school romance that normally breaks apart in an earlier time span.
I was naive back then. I had placed my future with her. I had placed almost everything for her.
I never had a chance to expound the word relationship. The fact that I never had a chance to have an intimate relationship with God is enough for that worldly relationship to break apart.
I was tempted to break her trust. She was tempted to break mine as well.
After months of dispute and negotiations, that night came. As I said earlier, I was wasted, broken, and crazy.
Months after that, broken fragments are slowly mended and fixed in one piece. Yet, there is always a hole in my heart. A hole that can't be filled by my family. A hole that can't be supplied by my friends. A hole that can't be completed by me.
Then that "days" came. I was invited almost everyday by my friends to attend youth services again. And it didn't stop with my friends. My mom told me that she heard that there is a Christian church within UP and she thinks we should attend.
In short, even though they can't fill the hole, God moved within them. The last problem was me.
I can't decide. Offering my life for Him? Sacrifice? Serve? Worship?
What kind of solution is that?
Yet He didn't gave up on me. It was April, I decided to go again to the youth service. But this is different. I know that this is different. There is a resolve appearing within me. Then I did it. I raised my hand when I was given a chance. I accepted Him. I offered myself for Him.
The best thing happened is that I felt every heavy part in my body became light in His presence...
It has been one year since I made that decision. True. I have no regrets. In fact, all I can offer is my thanks to God, and that I resolved in serving Him with all my heart. He introduced to me godly friends enriched with godly counsel. I have a healthy fellowship with them. Most of all, I was introduced in His ministry. Now, I was called to serve Him full-time.
There are still things God will change within me. I know my past was gone. I know that the new has come and will still come.
Kevin John San Diego Domingo
June 5, 2012
I was born in a Christian family. But during my boyhood to pre-adolescent years, I don't have a taste in attending weekly services. I restricted my walk with God by personally studying the Bible and having weekly Bible study with my family.
The routine continued for the next years until I became a high school student. Slowly, my interest on studying the Bible was buried by tons of requirements in a secular school.
I have my religion, but the relationship was thrown.
That relationship was replaced when I had romantic connections with a girl in our school. For 3 years since 2007, I thought that I will make that relationship last, different from the high school romance that normally breaks apart in an earlier time span.
I was naive back then. I had placed my future with her. I had placed almost everything for her.
I never had a chance to expound the word relationship. The fact that I never had a chance to have an intimate relationship with God is enough for that worldly relationship to break apart.
I was tempted to break her trust. She was tempted to break mine as well.
After months of dispute and negotiations, that night came. As I said earlier, I was wasted, broken, and crazy.
Months after that, broken fragments are slowly mended and fixed in one piece. Yet, there is always a hole in my heart. A hole that can't be filled by my family. A hole that can't be supplied by my friends. A hole that can't be completed by me.
Then that "days" came. I was invited almost everyday by my friends to attend youth services again. And it didn't stop with my friends. My mom told me that she heard that there is a Christian church within UP and she thinks we should attend.
In short, even though they can't fill the hole, God moved within them. The last problem was me.
I can't decide. Offering my life for Him? Sacrifice? Serve? Worship?
What kind of solution is that?
Yet He didn't gave up on me. It was April, I decided to go again to the youth service. But this is different. I know that this is different. There is a resolve appearing within me. Then I did it. I raised my hand when I was given a chance. I accepted Him. I offered myself for Him.
The best thing happened is that I felt every heavy part in my body became light in His presence...
It has been one year since I made that decision. True. I have no regrets. In fact, all I can offer is my thanks to God, and that I resolved in serving Him with all my heart. He introduced to me godly friends enriched with godly counsel. I have a healthy fellowship with them. Most of all, I was introduced in His ministry. Now, I was called to serve Him full-time.
There are still things God will change within me. I know my past was gone. I know that the new has come and will still come.
Kevin John San Diego Domingo
June 5, 2012